Where I Am

STOP! If you don't have a lot of time today, don't bother reading my blabbing here.  Just scroll down and read the words in italics.  They are much more helpful than my own. :)

I am living in some of the most desperate times of my life.  Other times seem just peachy.  A friend or my mom will call, and I'll sound (and feel) like things are just grand.  But, maybe just five minutes after I get off of the phone, I am bawling and feel like I'm on the brink of sanity and just plain miserable.  The truth is, I don't know when I've been more tired in my life.  (Sorry to keep complaining to you about this.)  I realize that this contributes to my general mental health.  But, it also can be no excuse for sin in my life; and honestly, I just do not want it to control my days any more.  I don't want to merely survive.  I want to thrive.

This article that I read at Girl Talk this morning (camped out on the couch at 5am, so I could be sure that Simon stopped crying before I fall back into a deep sleep) put words to many of my feelings and offered me great encouragement and a helpful challenge.  I am ashamed to say that it has taken far too many months for my daily afflictions to draw me near to God.  

Take a quick minute to read this.  I am sure you will appreciate it too.

Every Day Providence

Recently, my sweet 2-year-old misplaced her desire to sleep through the night. Mommy has been hard at work helping her to find that desire again. But it’s meant little sleep for Mommy at night and long days of wanting to crawl into the nearest bed. Mix in a rather nasty cold for the two-year-old and some pregnancy hormones for Mommy and I will leave the rest to your imagination.

But you know what? This tiny trial has forced me to draw near to God. And just as it tells me in His Word, He has been faithful to draw near to me (James 4:8). He has been reminding me of His sovereignty and love. This situation didn’t catch Him by surprise and it is the BEST for my girl and me. Sweet comfort!

So no matter where you find yourself today—in a trial big or tiny. Remember, the Lord isn’t surprised and He has PROMISED to work for your good in all things (Rom. 8:28).

These words from J. C. Ryle have brought me much encouragement:

“Reader, if God has given you His only begotten Son, beware of doubting His kindness and love, in any painful providence of your daily life! Never allow yourself to think hard thoughts of God. Never suppose that He can give you anything which is not really for your good. Remember the words of Paul: ‘He who spared not His own Son—but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things’ (Romans 8:32).

See in every sorrow and trouble of your earthly pilgrimage the hand of Him who gave Christ to die for your sins! That hand can never smite you except in love! He who gave His only begotten Son for you, will never withhold anything from you which is really for your good. Lean back on this thought and be content. Say to yourself in the darkest hour of trial, ‘This also is ordered by Him who gave Christ to die for my sins. It cannot be wrong. It is done in love. It must be well.’"

You can read the original article here.  If you haven't already, you really need to subscribe to this blog.